Its not to harsh. It may not be harsh enough. If he is in San Antonio for Army Training then he is in AIT not Basic. It's not near as rough as basic which isn't that rough anymore. If you are in financial crisis you need to call his chain of command. That would be his company commander. You can find the number on the Fort Sam Houston webpage. I don't know what unit he is in or I'd help. His Company Commander / First Sergeant will get him to straight out his/your finacial matters. That is part of their job. It is his responsibility as a soldier to take care of his family. He is getting paid a lot more money than he needs to live on in training. Almost everything is paid for. Except party money on the weekends. Make him do the right thing.Is this to harsh to send to my husband who is at basic?
As far as the letter goes it is succinct, caring, adresses your concerns, is appropriate, and well worded. There is a touch of harhness in it but it isn't misplaced nor (in my oppinion) should it be censored.
One thing I would like too point out is that your husband's abilty too respond too a letter of this nature while in basic military training is savagely limited. In an amongst getting yelled at, drilling, eating, more drilling, some more yelling, physical training, getting yelled at while training, ect ect ect... he doesn't have the time or emotional resorces available too him to be able too appropriately adress your concerns.
Basic really is a Big Deal.
However... having said that you do have several issues that need too be resolved and need too be resolved in the nearish kind of future. You are going too have too decide for your self if it is worth waiting for him too graduate till you adress them or if you need them resolved earlier.
Just too clearify... I really don't have a clear perspective of your situations or your concerns but I think based solely on the letter that you are going too get better answers from him if you bring them up after graduation.
If you would like too contact me via email or IM please feel free. It sounds like you need someone on the out side of your situation too talk too.
Yes it's too harsh. It's a shame that you two didn't figure out your financial arrangments before you but who am I to say. Not sure of you employment status, but if you are in financial status then do what most men do when short of cash and become employed. Not being critical or sarcastic, just blunt.
Hope he graduates on time and you guys work out your personal matters.
why put all that crap on him, throw all that crap in the garbage can and write him a nice and kind letter, telling him you and the kids miss him... that you can not afford to come to his graduation, but in spirit you are there for him....and always will be ....tell him that you are dealing with the stuff at home and not to worry...everything will be all right....
you have to support him in his being in the service and keep the nagging and complaining out of letters and phone calls...it is hard enough for him to be away from you and the kids, do not make it harder for him....it is what one has to do for their man while he is away...he might go overseas and he does not need to hear all the crap right now...keep it light and loving and this is the way to endear yourself with him.....if his family does not contact you, then be a woman and do what you are supposed to do...be a mom to your kids, and stand strong...
Dan's a big boy now he will have to deal with this as well as any other family hassle. These problems will only get worse if you two don't get a handle on them now!. So send it girl get to the bottom of this nonsense.The part of not giving you power of attorney is very disturbing and you are right to worry so show no mercy in this matter your family depends on it.
This can wait until your husband comes back to talk to him face by face.
If you give him the letter there is noway he could call you real quick you lucky that he did call you once mebay he got in trouble for it and why did he do that because he wanted to talk to you.
they letter is not harsh but i would wait until he got out of basic .
yes, this is way too harsh. basic was quite an ordeal, and you need to be supportive. your husband is trying to do something to secure a future for your family. the military is a great way for people to advance themselves in life and provide security for their families.
you might want to keep most of the main points, but just try put things in a more positive light, for his sake. i remember them advising me in the army to never give anyone power of attorney, so don't take it personally.
Was this a shotgun wedding? You should know him better than the people here, but I would have to say that he might have a hard time dealing with potential death in Iraq. If so, why did he join the military? Seems like he might have major issues.
no its fine
He has an obligation to support his family, and the military will enforce that for you. However, something that important should be face to face.
Just a little.I hope that it is a joke.
Sounds like he and his family are playing games and if I were in your shoes I wouldn't beat around the bush I would flat out write him a note and tell him he either changes for the better or find a new girl because you have a full plate with two childern to raise and can't even find out a thing about his pay because he and his family have blocked your access which tells me he doesn't want you to know the whole story in the end. As for the night before he left I'm sorry but this also tells me he is either self centered ;egotistical or just down right ignorant.As for going to see him guess what I wouldn't put that burden on my family because he doesn't seem to understand that it takes two to make a relatioinship and you already have two small childern that also deserve to have things such as clothes food a home on and on. Let him know this isn't a game he's going to continue playing it is a matter of life and death and you deserve the truth not these little kiddie games he and his family are playing. Im totally up front and honest I think your being played and that is not a good thing he's using time and distance to get rid of you I would definately have it out one way or the other. Good Luck!
It is a little too harsh, especially for the situation at hand. Perhaps you should save it for face-to-face. Hold on to the letter, and give it to him later. In the meantime, write him a more positive letter, with absolutely no criticism. He doesn't need that right now, and you'll have PLENTY of time to do it later, trust me.
Send it or not the fact that your husband is going is what's important. I sure hope he knows what he is leaving his girl and going to kill for, and maybe die for, I hope he knows that the people of Iraq are defensless, and that , that's who they will be killing. For no reason what so ever!
send it to the scumbag and get another decent man
Graduation to him now will be a big deal but in the end its a bunch of crap, his journy has just began. When he gets to his next duty station he will send for you, Good Luck and tell him you arent coming for grad.
Way to harsh, Letters like this in basic are destracting and more often irritating. I got a letter somewhat like this while i was in basic, i was nervous about it so of course i acted different.. it was all i could think about.. when she sent me a letter asking if i was cheating on her or if i had found another. which with out saying it you imply it in that letter. The letter made me upset caused a fight which lead to me breaking it off after my return home. He needs to keep his mind on his training. Dont send that
good...
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