Sex after separation?

My husband and I began a separation 7 months ago. We aren't able to work things out Love-Wise but are happy to remain great friends. I'm still living with him for the next few months until I can save up enough money to start renting a place of my own. But, I really want some sex. Is it ok to sleep with him? Have you slept with your husband after separation? I know it's not going to lead anywhere as we are both just friends now. I don't want to go out and pick up some random guy as he was my first and we've been together for 12 years; I'm comfortable with him and he knows what I like in bed. Is that a bad thing? He knows how I feel but is reluctant as he thinks that I will think it will make us fall in love again... but I don't. He doesn't think people do this sort of thing. Is he right?Sex after separation?
I've known women who have said that the best sex they ever had with their husband, was after they got a divorce. But....the fact that your husband was your first and you have been together for 12 years, continuing to have sex with him will only make it that much harder for you to end your relationship with him and get on with your life.





Usually when you carrying on a relationship which is considered ';friends with benefits';, sooner or later one person feels like they are being used and taken advantaged of and wants more then just sex.





It will be hard to live with a man you were once in love with, and now you are suppose to be only friends, who have sex with each other. Not a good situation.





From you letter, I get the feeling you don't really want to end this relationship. Could this be true? It also sounds like your husband is afraid that if the two of you continue to have sex, that you won't fully except the break up and get on with your life.





Not many loving and caring people can just have sex, without forming an emotional attachment to that person. It sounds like your husband wants to break that attachment.





To answer your husband's statement, ';do people do this sort of thing?'; Yes they do, but someone always gets hurt and it could prevent the two of you from staying friends after you move out.Sex after separation?
I think ur just horny and need to go out with his best friend and bring him home for a 3some. maybe that will get his butt in gear and see how great the sex is. yes people do it after breake up, i did for a year and it was great.
I think he is right.
i sure do think that is a good way to complicate things. i have to agree with your husband. i really don't think it is a good idea either. just try to restrain and control yourself until you are a single woman.
he probably still loves you..





or he'd screw you and toss you to the curb.





i think it's a bad idea.. and unfair to him


in fact you probably shouldnt have sex with anyone while your still living there..





if your his friend .. really his friend.. then you'll avoid the sex thing around him.
Not a good move, your husband is right to worry because you will start to feel that way no matter what you think right now. If this is really over, and are you both really certain of that?, but if it is then you need to start keeping a distance from him and get out of there as soon as you possibly can. Go back to mom and look for a place would be better than what you are doing. It is called dragging your feet. You are not trying to save the marriage but you are not tryng to end it either. Doing that sort of thing is not healthy especially for you, and it cannot lead to anything good, especially for you.
Bravo for your husband. At least he's not being a pig and saying oh well I will just take the extra action.





Are you sure that you can't work things out? It appears he still loves you. You didn't say why you separated. It would be great if you could work things out. Of course he knows what you like in bed, he was/is your husband. If he didn't know after 12 years then that would be saying something!





However; I don't think the two of you have fallen out of love. Sometimes separation is needed to make you see what you have, and that you still love the person you are married to just don't like some of their actions.





Have the two of you tried marriage counseling? If not try it, you may be surprised at what you can work out! I wouldn't suggest having sex with him at this point, emotionally it might really hurt both of you at this time. Now if you want to work things out then I might suggest you go ahead. But at this point if you both agree its over then do yourself a favor and do not have sex with him. Emotionally it will drain you.





I hope you can try and work it out.





To try and fail is still success. To fail without trying is only failure.
Well .. if its just casual sex then im assuming it'd be fine.
This is a horrible idea. You need to do some soul searching and ask yourself if you are being selfish. Obviously you know it could complicate things or you wouldn't be asking. You are a woman and you know how to pleasure yourself until you find the right person to have sex with. You guys have a friendship that most can't find after a split. Don't ruin it by complicating things. It can only lead to hard feelings from one or the other in the end and may delay you leaving when you need to if for no other reason, to find yourself and decide what you really want in life. Good luck.
Ask him if it will make him feel better if you went out and picked a guy up just to have sex. The problem is guys really don't think we women get horny and that's what you need to tell him. If you are in your late 30's well into your 40's you are approaching your sexual peak and you do want sex. I was separated from my husband at age 43 until 45 and i can tell you i wanted sex from him and he was more then willing to give it to me. We did get back together and fell back in love with each other.
if you were with him that long it is way ok to have sex.


not everyone has sex and fall in love.i don't think yah should get a divorce.
I think it is a very common situation when relationships end on good terms. The problem comes when one of you meets a new love, but are still seeing on another for sex. I don't think it is a issue, as you said, he knows you and knows what you like. Just walk in to his room at night and get busy:) I bet he is not going to stop you. If you want sex, just think what he is thinking!!!
No, you should not be having sex with him it will only lead to more problems.
i think hes right and hes already haveing sex with someone else, and if you havent had none in 7 months then IM THE ONE, experiment a little ,there are some pervs out there , i suggested myself just in case you got desperate , and im not a perv or some sort of freak, stay away from the pervs and the freaks